Thursday, May 22, 2014

MAMASPICE 'S DIARY

"I never think of the future. It comes soon enough."Albert Einstein


In a little over a week school will be over.   These past twelve months really flew by. They slipped through my fingers like our goldfish Sushi (may he rest in peace).

These are my checks and balances.
" Begin at the beginning and go on till you come to an end, then stop" Lewis Carroll


Visits to the hairdresser, zero.  Visits to the butcher/cheesemonger 115.
Pair of socks purchased in a year, 40. Number of socks accounted for this morning, 15.
Pair of shoes gone missing, 3. Pair of shoes recovered, 3. Not the same ones.
Days spent planning a trip to Italy 300. Day spent on a trip in Italy, zero.
Cheap flights to Italy booked, one.
Cheap flights to Italy cancelled by the Italian Antitrust Authority, one.
Trucks that got stolen, one. Trucks that were recovered by the Sheriff of Marin, one.
iPhones that got stolen, one. iPhones tracked down and made to return, one.
Criminal gangs delivered to the justice system, almost one (the police would not collect fingerprints from the iPhone's case later found in the bushes outside the Panda Express).
Hours spent believing I have a chance of running The No.1 Ladie's Detective Agency, countless.
Heterosexual friends turned homosexual, one. Homosexual friends turned heterosexual, one.
School applications submitted, 3. Schools placement letters received, 2.
Placement letters lost forever, one.
Children who will be enrolled in a Chinese immersion school, one.
Children who will get no help whatsoever doing their homework, one.
Animals adopted in the last 12 months, 3.
Animals that tried to run away, one (Houdini the Turtle).
Animals that tried to commit suicide and succeeded, one (we miss you Sushi).
Teenage daughters, 2.
Daughters under 13 years of age, that act like teenagers, 2.
Most repeated sentences by others: -What's for dinner?-
Most repeated sentences by me: - What do you mean what's for dinner? We just ate!!!!!- and also
-What do you mean what's for dinner? it's seven in the morning!!!!!-

"Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans" John Lennon








2 comments:

  1. Oh gosh, your life it's so interesting! :D

    (what you mean by "cancelled by the Italian Antitrust Authority"?)

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  2. Il T.A.R. insomma, che ha sospeso i voli di United Emirates tra NY e Milano e poi gli ha dato una proroga fino all fine dell'estate ma io mi ero gia' cagata addosso e ho sospeso il tutto.

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