Friday, December 7, 2012

LETTER TO SAM CLAUS (you say tomato...)


Dear Sam Claus,
every year we do this thing where we tell each other we are not getting anything fancy for Christmas, and then you get me something incredible and I get you underwear.
Except for one time, when you got me an umbrella shaped like a sword. It was perfect.
Last year you gave me a Picasso ( it could as well have been). You don't play fair.

Christmas at the Spice House means constant negotiation.
My picture of Christmas? A cow, a donkey and a manger.
Your picture of Christmas? The Willie Wonka factory, on the Las Vegas Strip ,in the middle of Disneyland all wrapped up with red ribbon.
It's the time of the year where we learn the true meaning of the word compromise.
I have to accept the fact that we will decorate a gigantic tree.
You have to subscribe to a downsizing rate as the years go by.
( You know what they say of a man who buys a very big tree........)
The other thing is that we never seem to agree on the presents for the kids.
What happens is that the girls write their letters to Santa. I intercept them.
We each then try to fulfill  them.
Me, by going through all the second hand stores, flea markets and black markets in town.You by taking no shortcuts and especially no discounts.
Then, on December 24th, we panic and try to get even more presents.
On Christmas Day, the only things the girls play with, are the cardboard boxes the gifts come in.
Last year, our toddler spent the day cuddling, petting and bouncing one  RED APPLE. She even took it to sleep with her.
However, the next morning somebody ate it.
Let that be a lesson to all of us.


And now the first ever Mamaspice contest:
tell me what was the craziest Christmas present you ever received . The winner will take home this fabulous magnet (I will ship anywhere in the world!).
Good luck!!!

2 comments:

  1. A magnet saying "FUCK YOU" but no tomato nor good leering lady either.

    This year, I'd like the tomato and the girl!

    :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No way, really?
      Well this year you might just get it:)

      Delete